Tonight on Lost we learned we're all going to die. Aaaagh!
Technically, that's not news, we are all going to die, but tonight's pronouncements by physicist-cum-prophet Daniel Faraday seemed to bring that development much, much closer to reality for our favorite Losties.
Let's discuss what went down tonight, what it means and the likelihood that our heroes can regain control long enough to reunite with all their friends and maybe even get off Mystery Friggin' Island once and for all...
What We Learned
Oedipus Never Had It So Good: Eloise Hawking killed her son, Daniel, and she always knew he would grow up to come back to the Island so she could kill him by accident, and his whole life, as organized by her, was leading up to this. Lord. Where are my time-travel sickness pills?
The Circle Remains Unbroken: Told you so! Charles Widmore and Eloise Hawking are Daniel Faraday's parents, which means Penny and Daniel are half-siblings. We always knew that Desmond had the father-in-law from hell in Charles Widmore, but who knew he had an evil stepmother, too? (OK, we don't know for sure if Charles and Ellie were ever married, but you take the point, yes?) This adds such an intriguing layer to the season-three scene where Mrs. Hawking dissuaded Desmond from proposing to Penny.
Now, are there interesting connections to be made between secret Shephard half-siblings Claire and Jack and secret Widmore half-siblings Penny and Dan? (Is Jack's mother going to eventually accidentally shoot him in the gut?) The comments are open...
The Hatch Explained, Sort Of: OK, so...according to Daniel Faraday, the Island has a dangerous underground energy surplus, which was capped off by the construction of the hatch in the 1970s, and which can be off-gassed by pushing the button at regular 108-minute intervals. Wow, Locke and Des really were saving the world. Arguably we already knew that, if we extrapolated from what happened when Des didn't push the button and more or less brought down Oceanic flight 815, but still, it's extremely reassuring to hear that fact stated by no less an authority than Daniel Faraday. Well, Daniel is a reliable authority on what already happened, but can't really say that his present/future plan to "negate the energy under the Swan" by detonating a hydrogen bomb seems all that smart. One of this evening's many memorable reaction shots was the "WTF?" look on Kate's face upon hearing that little plan. Good girl.
P.S. If we blew up the Swan at the end of the season two, what happened to the Island's problematic energy surplus? Is the energy seared/sealed/soldered shut inside the earth, or was the purple sky the end of it, or do we have other problems yet to come?
Commitment: Loved Jin and Hurley and everybody sticking to their guns and agreeing to stay on the Island and face down whatever weirdness is yet to come.
Radzinsky Sucks: The stupid annoyingness of Phil is topped only by the stupid annoyingness of Radzinsky. Mind your own business, dirty hippies! (Seriously, it cannot be good that Sawyer and Juliet are in the custody of those mooks!)
Mrs. Hawking Rocks: Just want to give props to Fionnula Flanagan for the hilarious look of disgust that crossed her face when Penny suggested she was the mother of Ben Linus. Hee.
Daniel's Memories: Sorry to be dense, but Daniel's off-Island memory loss was because at that time he lacked a constant, right? Maybe? Sorry, the time-travel stuff melts my brain.
The Variable: Per Daniel, we are the variable. Yep, it's us humans with our free will that can turn the course of destiny away from seemingly certain doom. He's positively Obama-esque, don't you think? (Sorry, mandatory shoutout to the guy for wrapping up his 100-days press conference in the alloted hour instead of bleeding into Lost!)
Yuck: In life, nerdy not-quite-couple Daniel and Charlotte had their moments, but her death scene earlier in the season and his scene tonight with young Charlotte were just squicky and awful. What a tragic and doomed pair. RIP, Daniel and Charlotte.
Paranoia: When that nurse volunteered to watch Charlie (Hume), did anyone else scream at the TV, "Do not leave your children lying around, Penny!!" Mrs. Hawking seems to have left the building in due haste, but for a minute there I was sure she was going to make off with Penny and Des' kid! (Five years of baby-napping and bad parenting on this show has led to massive paranoia about the welfare of any and all children.)
(Last part posted on Spoiler Page)